We have all heard or used the English idiom – “don’t judge a book by its cover” quite a few times. It has probably been overused. My question to you today is this – Does this really apply in real life? Did you say yes? Really? Think about it for a minute.
What happened a few days ago when you sat next to someone with body odour?
How did you receive the girl who did not smile when she saw you?
Were you friendly to the guy in the tattered clothes that just walked by?
“Don’t judge a book by its cover, see a man by his cloth, as there is often a good deal of solid worth and superior skill underneath a jacket and yaller pants.”
Be truthful to yourself, you are only human. As humans, visuals mean a lot to us – we are affected by what we see. We judge people based on facial expressions, clothes, how they talk, who they are with and so on. The issue with focusing on visuals is that they often lead to wrong conclusions, allowing us to possibly miss the opportunity of making a new friend, learning something new or expand our worldview.
We interpret visuals based on our worldview, morals and upbringing – this is normal. Have you ever wondered if your worldview is right? What makes it right? What makes it wrong? Who says things are the way they are or not? Is there really a right or wrong? Why do I think the way I do? Are my standards too high? Sometimes there is the need to ask these questions and dig deep into the reason why we think the way we do. Are your thoughts always right? These are some of the questions I ask myself every now and then.
Over the years, I have heard people refer to me as a snob/ an unfriendly person just because I do not warm up to people immediately. The interesting part is that most of these people have never said more than hello to me (some have never met me), but they concluded based on my looks. I am writing this not because I need to call anyone out, but just to say we need to think outside the box. You never know what anyone is going through/have been through…
“Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment.” – John 7:24
That someone does not smile does not mean they are unfriendly – the person could be going through a tough time.
That someone does not hug you back does not mean they do not like you – maybe the person does not know how to/ did not grow up hugging people….
Sometimes, all the other person needs is a smile, a friendly face, a hug, a hi/hello… Let’s desist from judging people based on their appearance. Discover the inner person. Spread love, show love. Maybe it is time to change your worldview. Do not be rigid, a little flexibility might make a difference to your life and that of others.
“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you.” – Matthew 17:1-2
7 Comments Add yours
Brilliant! I enjoyed reading this. Thanks for sharing Lola and reminding us to love without prejudice.
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Thanks Lola, very good and insightful. Will also share this with my children. Thank you.
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I appreciate your comment, please share with as many as possible 😉
Lola very interesting read. I know , feel and understanding where your coming from. I think the same as well. I often feel like I have a sign on my forehead stating “piss off” or something. But I only put it down to people being people. I value the saying ” those who know me know me well, those who don’t well can take the express lane to ……(wherever 😉).
I was walking with my 3 kids one day and an African(probably Jamaican) woman kept looking at me, like she was trying to analyse me, then finally summoned the courage to walk up to me and say” aren’t u too young to be having kids? I am like 😳, oh wow. Pure judgement. She definitely put me in the generation X category, where babies are having babies. Which I thought was sad on her part. But hey c’est la vie.
All in all thank you for sharing. Looking forward to the next. 😘😘
Can you imagine? Who asked her?
Take it as a compliment, you’re looking good girl 😉
Lola, glad you’re writing again. Great insight especially for these interesting times that we live in. We really need to be more empathic and less judgemental. Someone once said “we don’t see things as they are but as we are”, so based on appearance alone we could be barking up the wrong tree. Asking questions is one of the ways we can correct our perspectives.
Looking forward to your next article.😉