Mirror! Mirror!

I love watching my children play, listening to them talk… They are the best of friends most times, they have each other’s backs. You should see them defending each other to outsiders, it is hilarious.

The other day, they were talking about marriage and how they cannot marry each other (they are 4 and 6)… My daughter said she will marry one of the boys in her school and started naming the possible options hahahaha. I interjected and told her she didn’t have to marry someone from her school and she was having none of it. It was a very interesting conversation and I must say that it reminded me of the huge responsibility parents have.

Parenting as we know is about much more than having children, it’s about raising leaders, changers, innovators…. These precious gifts are given to us by God, for us to nurture, raise, lead them in the right path. These little ones are affected by our words and actions. They soak it all up. You cannot get into a vehicle at ours without my little safety officers asking if your seatbelt is on.

“Behold, children are a heritage and gift from the LORD, The fruit of the womb a reward.”

PSALMS‬ ‭127:3‬ ‭AMP

As a mother, I am the woman my daughter looks up to, the one she will become (and more), the one she will behave like. I am the model for my son’s future girlfriend and wife . I am the basis of their relationships. This is the same for fathers too. Fathers are their daughter’s future boyfriend and husband, their son’s role model, who he will be in the future.

The qualities I possess are their normal. They will determine future relationships. This is a huge task, not one to be taken lightly.

I am a foundation, mindful of my words and actions, purposeful about the time spent with them. I do not always get it right but I do apologise especially when I yell. Yelling is not the answer, it only frightens and upsets them. It never really gets the true message across. I tell them that anger is their choice, never the other person’s. Yes someone may upset you, your reaction is completely your choice.

Every now and again, I take a step back and reflect on how I relate with my children and what I communicate through my words and actions. This is for me is super important. I want them to be everything they have been created to be and I want to fully act and own my part in helping them achieve this.

I am their mirror, I see my reflection in them. I know you already know this but do you ever spare a moment to think about what type of mirror you are to your children?

Our children are precious gifts, we are their role models, we all need to play our parts in helping them be the best they can be. Parenting the way our parents did might not work in our time, change it if need be. There are really no written rules, only that we must be mindful of the values we pass on.

The way we act and speak around our children matter, it affects them. We can learn from our parents and how they handled things, we can improve on them. Our childhood experiences happened, doesn’t mean they were right. Let’s learn from them.

An angry parent will possibly raise angry children, a compassionate parent will raise compassionate children.

Choose your actions wisely, I am conscious of mine, still working on mine. Choose intentional parenting.

2 Comments Add yours

  1. Sade says:

    A good read.

    Like

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